Doing a little better

So now I'm a little better off than I was the past couple of days. I still feel on edge a little bit about being in the apartment all the time but it's starting to lessen. I did manage to get out after work and just hang out one of my favorite books stores for about a half an hour. It was nice just walking around. Though I did cave and bought a couple more books to read but considering my track record I should be through them in a little while.

I think the only thing that still worrying me is the fact that K's not hearing what I'm saying to him. I said I wanted to leave for a bit around the holidays and stay with my folks. Just to get way for a bit and he was still thinking yesterday that I wanted to leave him and just stay with my folks. It's just a tad frustrating because he here's what he wants to hear. After more talking we got on the same page but sometimes it's just not that easy to talk to him. But such is life.

Other than that things are going okay. The only downfall was that work yesterday sucked majorly. I pretty much had to open by myself since the person that usually helps out in the mornings called in sick the night before. So I had to make sure everything was on, holds were picked out and sorted and the doors were open up all before 7:45am. I managed to do all of that before one of the others came in to help out. But I thought things would be okay once we were open...I was sadly mistaken. Students coming in didn't know where they were going. Passing printing equipment thinking what they printed out was at our desk instead of were they were in the computer lab. We had to cover for another worker in another department so it strained are already limited crew of people. So for the majority of the day everyone was running around doing other peoples work and our own. It was good because it made the day go faster but frustrating because of all the work we had piled onto ourselves. Job security. *sighs*

So far today hasn't been too bad. Just have to open by myself again this morning but there hasn't been too much of a rush so I'm hoping things well be calmer today. I really hope so cause I've got another wicked headache coming on. *crosses fingers*


Dark weekend

So last night when I was about to go to bed I kind of freaked out and started crying.

Over the past few weeks just was feeling majorly depressed and having a touch of cabin fever I finally broke down. It just really got to me the fact that I haven't been able to do things that I would normally do. I've tried reading and watching anime to pass the time but it seems right now that its not working. I'm just sick of seeing the same 4 walls day in and day out. I might try to break up what I do before I come home and hope that lessens it some. I hope that'll work just going to other stores and shop and just hang out for a half hour or so till I feel like going back home. Just being in the rut of going to work and home and doing stuff that I have to do seems to me just grating on my nerves. I wish gas wasn't so expensive so I could maybe drive around a little and just hang out in random places till I feel the need to come home and sit there.

I did feel a little bit better while I was knitting my ascot. That's probably because it was a small project and I was able to finish it fairly quickly so I got some instant gratification about that. I'm starting to feel a little pull from some of the projects that I set aside so hopefully I'll be able to pick one of them up and start knitting on them too.

I'm just in a blah mood and now I'm trying to get out of it...hopefully soon so I can get over this and move on.


I finally finished making my ascot! It was a very simple pattern to knit up. Course it does help that my head was finally clear from my cold so I could focus on knitting. ^^;

Finished and being blocked!

Close up

Close up of edging

Me wearing it!


New Project

I'm currently working on the free Lana & Clark Ascot pattern from Vickie Howell. So far it's been a quick pattern to knit up. Still working on the first half of it. The only snag I ran into so far was trying to knit 4 stitches together. My first attempt I had to rip out a few rows. I left it at that for the evening and tonight when I get home I'm going to attempt it again. The Vickie Hoewll Love yarn that I'm using is really nice to work with. It's not splitting too badly. My only complaint is that one of the hanks I purchased is cut and re-tied in several places. If I do manage to use it it's going to have to be on a small project with all the bumps in this particular ball. But it's my fault for not trying to wind it in a ball earlier when it was within the return time. Oh well. I should have wip pics up soon!




Well today has been in a word....weird. The patrons coming into the library are just being strange today with their questions and behaviors. I'm just glad I came in early so that I can leave early and get away from these strange people. I hope tomorrow will be better. :-s

This weekend was decent. I managed to finish up the one I was reading and read another one and starting a third! Other than that I spent the majority of my time waiting for people when I should have just been sleeping to continue to combat my chest cold.

Saturday was fun, spent the first part of the day reading one book and then later on in the evening I met up with a friend from high school that I haven't seen since '95. It was fun to reminisce about old times and was kind of funny to see that he hadn't changed much since high school. He's still the same funny kid he was in school.

Sunday was just tiring. After spending most of the night chatting I should have slept in but it didn't happen for whatever reason. So I did a lot of chores and running around while I was waiting for the cable guy to come over and fix my cable and internet. Turns out the wire outside had snapped. So not sure if someone cut/messed with it or if it just was an old connection that snapped. Oh well I'm just glad it's fixed and that I'm up and running again.

Today I'm just tired but I get to go home soon and hopefully will be able to calm down enough so I can go to sleep sooner. Anyway...that's the plan...^^;



Feeling under the weather

I don't know if it's a delayed reaction to my work schedule changing but I'm not feeling my best as of late.

I've been trying to be good about making sure I eat a little something before I go in. It's not as much as I used to eat before I went in a few months ago but I'm trying so I don't get so run down. I'm still eating what I'm bringing to work for lunch. I don't know why I would be feeling this way except for the change in activity. I'm still trying to be active when I get home though as of late I haven't really been into anything as much as I used to. I've slowed down with my reading too. I felt a little guilty returning a book the next Harry Potter book I was looking forward to reading. I did attempt to read it after I first checked it out but quickly lost interest in actually reading it. The other day I thought up the plan to just save up so I can buy the collection and then I can read them at my leisure. I had intended on buy the collection anyway so in the end it's probably for the best that I'm taking a break from the series. Aside from that it's taken me like 3 weeks and I still haven't finished my other book I was reading. Just kind of said because usually I can read one of those erotic books in a couple of days. I've only got a few more chapters to go so hopefully I'll be finished with it by this weekend. Then I'll just take a break from everything and see what peeks my interest again and go from there.

Last weekend I did managed to make 2 more granny squares in different patterns. I'm still trying to post pics of those when I can get a decent shot of them without some sort of weird glare. Other than that I'm still stalled out on knitting and crocheting projects that I'd like to do. I guess over the past few weeks I've been doing too much and just need a break from everything.

I also managed to work a little on a story that I don't think I'll ever finish. I'm still getting random scenes in my head and trying to get them down on paper. I just have to try and eventually make the time to sit down and figure out how to put them all together so that it will all make sense.

Other than that things are going pretty well. I was found by an old friend that I used to hang out with in high school. It's going to be wild when we actually do meet up considering I haven't seen him since 95. I'm pretty sure I'll have to keep myself from crying when I meet up with him. ^^; For me it's a little wild that people still remember me and have been looking for me. It's cool to see how peoples lives have changed over the years. Though yesterday I really felt like I'm out of the loop with everything. Most of the people I know are or have already started families. I just feel out of the loop but I know I'm not really ready for a family. Well I think so...I just don't feel prepared for that kind of situation though I know no one really ever is ready for it.

I don't know maybe I am just starting to get sick and it's making me more depressed about things that I can't fix at the moment. I guess that might be part of the reason why I was crying again last night. Dah well, I'll just try to go home and go straight to bed after making a cup of tea and see if I just need to get more sleep...if that's possible.


It's taken hold of me!

So this morning after waking up uberly early (3am) I felt compelled to learn how to crochet a granny square. I got it right on the second try! now I'm just debating on making it a really big square and have that as a blanket or just finish off the square and make others to patch together. I'm thinking I'm going to go the lazy route and just make it one big square and just add different yarns as needed. Hopefully when I get home and get back too it I'll post pics of progress. It should be a good way to use up random balls of yarn I've got laying around from old projects I'm no longer interested in making.



I finally finished the lace shawl! X3 Enjoy. The pattern was a free Easy Triangle Shawl from Lion Brand. I used US 13's and a size K crochet hook for the edging. Was a simple lace pattern to knit up. I would knit up again just would pick another yarn instead of the Homespun. Had trouble with it catching on the needles and the hook at times. Other than that I had a slight issue with the dye lot. The skeins I used to knit this up were from the same lot but as you can see they were different colors. Though with the way this shawl was knit up it looks like I changed colors on purpose so I can't complain too much.